The Path of Uncertainty
“The most complex activities of thought can come to be without the conscience having taken part in them.” - Freud (Chaiklin, 2009)
This quote is found in the book The Art and Science of Dance/Movement Therapy: Life is Dance. It was preceded by a line that said a dance movement therapist must have the ability to tolerate uncertainty. That statement was referring to what may or may not occur in a movement therapy session. I learned that during the course of this unit, that tolerance of uncertainty had to be had.
The unit provided the opportunity for us students to explore the different paths dance can take oneself in a career. Some chose to learn about secondary school teaching while another, the aspects of lighting. I chose to research the field of dance movement therapy. I became intrigued by the profession after stumbling across it and wanted to learn more about it. The unit provided the perfect chance with which to do that.
In the initial stages of planning, all seemed well. The plan was to get in contact with various dance movement therapists and see if it was possible to gain a placement with them. After speaking to some, it was clear that the idea I had for a placement could not be. Due to the nature of the profession and confidentiality issues, I could not sit in on sessions done with patients. At first, the opportunity to assist a dance movement therapist in group sessions seemed to be on the horizon but the therapist disappeared like light at sunset. The feeling of hopelessness and despair set in. I did not want to abandon the initial research project so another plan came into place. The new plan was to meet with another dance movement therapist who practiced privately but also lectured at a university. She is a lecturer for students undertaking their master's degree in dance movement therapy. It all seemed bright. Getting in contact with her was easy and she was willing to discuss what she did. Another part of the plan was to meet with some of her students to find out about their journey to becoming a dance therapist. The project moved from a placement to one of discovering the journey to being a licensed dance therapist. The research would include psychology lectures,meetings with dance movement therapy students and one of their lecturers. After those happened, I would hold sessions with some of peers with the information gained.
Dance movement therapy utilizes psychology in the training. To further the research, it was decided that attending psychology lectures would be more than helpful. A colleague of mine,who was undertaking the same topic of research, and I went to meet with a senior lecturer at our university. Dr. Maria Livanou was very helpful and gave us consent to sit in on her clinical psychology lectures for third year students. She did not seem to hold dance movement therapy or any of the creative arts therapies, in high regard but that did not deter me. The lectures proved to be beneficial as I learned about behavioral problems and mental issues in depth. Another plan for the research project was to attend continuing professional development workshops aimed at practicing dance movement therapists. The workshops could be found on the Association for Dance Movement Therapy UK 's website. The workshops were not limited to practicing therapists, but also to students and dance artists. There were not many workshops available and most did not fit the research project except for one. Helen Payne, a widely recognized dance movement therapist, held a workshop on Authentic Movement. Due to unforeseen financial circumstances, I was not able to attend the workshop. My colleague, fortunately, was able to attend though.
My hope was riding on the masters students. The plan to meet with them fell through. Another feeling of despair arose within me. The correspondence with the dance movement therapist I spoke of before, stopped with no forewarning. I understand people lead busy lives but there was a assurance that plans would be seen through. I contacted her multiple times with what seemed to be success but to no avail. The meetings with her and the students were a major aspect of the research project. Determined to see my research through, I dove right in finding out the ways of dance movement therapy.
Research came by way of various books written by dance therapists and videos found on the internet of methods used in the profession. I also spoke with a practicing visual arts therapist to understand the field of creative arts therapy and how she got where she is today. I did not include my interview with her in my portfolio because majority of it was not pertinent to my project. The interview with her did help with the holding of my workshops.
After extensive research, I held two workshops with dance students who are in their final year. The purpose of the workshops were for the students to see dance/movement as a way of recognizing emotions. Even though I researched different methods used by dance movement therapists, I did not try to utilize them. Training is required for things such as movement analysis and years of study in the field of psychology as well. I did not want to play therapist but wanted to cultivate a sense of community and self recognition in the workshops.
The workshops or sessions as I have referred to them as in the portfolio, proved to be beneficial and eye opening. I chose to have participants that I knew for a sense of comfort. The thought of holding the workshops with people I did not know well, after all the disappointments I faced, did not sit well with me. I was eager, anxious even, for something to go right. A book called Practical something something was extremely helpful in planning the sessions. There were examples of exercises that could be done in a session and questions that the facilitator could ask themselves before, during and after. Using the questions and exercises as a guideline, I was ready to hold the workshops. The outcome of the first one was surprising and I felt really good about it. Despite the fact that we all knew each other, the goal of the session was achieved. The participants did dig deep within themselves and the movements helped them with that. The exercises were simple but effective. Another goal of the workshop was to have fun and fun was had. The second workshop did not go as smoothly as the first one. There seemed to be many contributing factors but the main ones were time and structure. I did not have enough time to go through the exercises as planned thus making the participants not as engaged as they could have been. That feeling of uncertainty of how the workshops would go loomed heavily over me before they actually happened. Uncertainty reigned supreme during the workshops and I had to tolerate that. I could not predict the outcome of the second workshop. I had to deal with it.
The research project did not go as planned. Uncertainty was a reoccurring theme throughout the past months. The uncertainty of placements, meetings and the project coming together. The uncertainty of how the workshops would go. One of the reasons for choosing this unit was to explore a career option, to see how I could effectively use my degree. The uncertainty of it all did not deter me from pursuing dance movement therapy as a career. I've developed and still am developing the ability to tolerate uncertainty. The profession of dance movement therapy might just be right for me then.
